My top reasons I would not want to visit Ancient Rome as a modern woman.

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Ok, first off I love this outfit! Gimme all the bright colors and fun!I love this simple orange dress and the way it looks with this Gucci bag.(Rent one here with Vivrelle!) Second my freaking shrubbery got some sort of mold and I had to prune the crap out of my poor little bushes. Topiaries whatever. While clipping and cursing the fungus and molds and bugs, I remembered I wanted to also blog today. But, what about? Should it be fashion centric or historical based. History hands down. It is after all my forte. Even though I would consider myself a degree less historian. Or what they so elegantly call on tiktok and YouTube “arm chair historians”. Trust me, I wanted to go to school for this crap but ignored my inner self.

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The main take away a lot of us inquisitive folk is history is gross and history sucks but damn it is fascinating and Freaking A, yeah the fact you would probably get so lost in the cities. As cities were built on top of ruined cities as things progresses.

 

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The other is a bit of an eye roll from me when I see people talk about “how much they would love to go back in time to Ancient Rome.” That usually paired with some girl stating her Disney backed ideology that she could make some man or emperor or king for that matter fall head over heels for her. Nope. Wouldn’t happen ladies. No matter what, although I could be wrong. I am known for being wrong! Stranger things have happened. 

I think?

Anyways, here are my top ten reasons you would not as a modern woman want to go back in time to Ancient Rome.

 

A.) It wasn’t the safest. You got to keep in mind as wonderful a place Rome is right now and the safety you can experience now as a tourist to a degree(every place even Orlando, Florida has crime) back in Ancient Rome it was a death sentence to go out at night. No modern  lights, the robbers  could and would shank you. And the likely hood of being raped is almost certain. The only way you could is with armed escort and a litter. And that was the privileged few. Men obviously had an easier time to venture out to one of many bars or brothels to gamble and drink.

B.) Women’s rights were not the greatest. So, if you think our rights right now are bad. Take a look no further than Ancient society. Women were better seen not heard. Your father controlled every aspect of your life. Your husband basically owned you. They did enjoy some rights but most of those were enjoyed by the lower classes believe it or not. Roman aristocratic ladies didn’t get as much as plebs. Paterfamilias was the right and it was patriarchal society. This is a empire that started as a republic that started in a swamp that was fueled by war and rape. Look up the rape of the Selbine women. They even built a stone effigy of the rape.

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C.) Everyone shits together and uses the same sponge to wipe their ass. Only the wealthiest had their own latrines. But even still they would sometimes meet in the bathrooms to poo together all that. It was important gossip spaces and for business meetings. But, I wouldn’t want to use the bathroom their because I hate public bathrooms and I would definitely not want to wipe my behind with the same sponge that the lady next to me used.Imagine if instead of zoom everyone met in the toilet and there was the one person who ate some bad tuna.

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D.) Bathhouses would be neat to see in use but honestly we’re not 100 percent the cleanest. If you had an open cut there was an possible chance of risk of infection. They were not cleaned regularly like someone today would expect. Water was recycled and it was probably not very clean. In fact the spread of intestinal parasites was common.

 

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e.) the whole butterfly effect or the timey wimey stuff that Dr Who speaks about. Fixed points in time. Of course who wouldn’t want to go back and fix things? But, that way back? Especially points in time that were essential for history to be as it is, and as horrible as a lot of history was and still is as it is being made. One would have to really wonder if jumping and saving someone destined to be dead would really make much of a difference. I guess you could always play it off as them being dead. I guess?

And the very last thing, the important thing here along with all of them to be honest is that thing we call a LANGUAGE barrier. Latin was the main language spoken, and yes there were many other languages spoken. Latin was the most important and one you got to get right. English did not exist as you know it today. No Tardis exists where you can use that to make it sound like you do. Time travel as marvelous as it sounds it not plausible, it still seems amazing. 

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All this being said, I think I say the only way is if and big if, I could have a garantee that I would be brought home after a day. OR if there was a place that moderns could congregate at and be tourists only to go back when the curfew states for our safety. I would love to see it all I honestly would bad stuff and all. I want to go to Pompeii in its prime and see all the Willie art and laugh. OF course hiding the phones and cameras would be really hard to do. Still imagine it. Timing it to possibly see Augustus and others. To see things before Mt Vesuvius wrecked the shorelines. 

 

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I think though this historian(Dame Mary Beard) sums it up best on the time travel in all honesty.

 

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