Managing my bipolar, it’s more than taking meds.

Managing my bipolar disorder is an interesting undertaking. When I first got a sort of diagnosis years ago and then a rediagnosis in 2021. I wasn’t upset,I was straight up in denial. Told I needed to go be admitted for testing and treatments. But, I couldn’t take off work. It was not a financial option at the time. Plus that would have been one expensive stay, America has some horrendous hospital debt due to how insurance is and no systems like you see in Australia, UK, even Russia.

Anyways, my bipolar disorder which goes hand in hand with my ADHD means managing it with medications. Mood Stabilizers. Medication to manage the ADHD. Medication for my extreme anxiety and depression. I have bipolar 1 , but for me, I have not a Scooby doo of a clue as to when I am manic, when I am depressed I can tell sort of. I think “meh, I am just tired” But not being able to get out of bed because of the why bothers and no one cares about me. I feel like my own family doesn’t like me either. At all.

I really have no idea when I am manic. I don’t know how to tell. Which is the scary part. Because many people(myself included) can have black out periods of mania. Which really sucks because sometimes you never get those memories back. Which I lost a lot of my 20’s thanks to that.

Therapy is what helps me deal with the black out. Therapy helps me deal with childhood trauma of being “the weird kid”. Quirks that most thought were just that, turned out to be more. And girls get misdiagnosed more than boys.

I have to now find ways of working with this mental illness. I now have to manage the disorders. Therapy with medications and stuff is how I manage. I also sew, color, puzzles, and blog to help me as well.

But what if someone you love doesn’t want you to do therapy? DO IT ANYWAYS. You owe it to yourself to do so. Because, you may need the extra help managing your disorder. Whether it is ADHD, autism, Bipolar, personality disorder, and so forth. You owe it to you to do this for you. You matter.

If they disagree, just remind them that it isn’t a you problem if they don’t like it. IT is a THEM problem. Financial issues could be a factor, copays and all but work it out with your therapists. And again screw them ¬†for not being compassionate to your needs. Because we all know they would expect it for THEM. Right?

Yes. It is not selfish. It is HEALTHCARE.

You got this. We got this. Mental health is healthcare.

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