So, Mom life. It can be a great thing. Honestly it is a great thing. I love my kids. I absolutely love my boys. But, I do not like the lack of sleep. When I was younger I was able to handle the lack of the zzz’s with gusto. Now in my mid*ugh* thirties I am not so great at dealing with it. My brain is foggier. I forget things and my health issues get worse. I also stem a lot more, my trichotillomania is worse and my stress and anxiety is through the roof. Things that normally would not faze me one bit all of a sudden make me want to scream. PS I will link to a similar outfit at the end of the post.
My oldest is autistic and my littlest may be as well. He(the littlest) sleeps ok. The oldest has a history of sleepwalking and doesn’t sleep well at all. Especially when he isn’t feeling well or allergies are horrible. So, when he is up, I am up. It is exhausting and then the next day I just want to dress as comfy as I can so I can be blob on the couch or something. It is hard to dress in the fun stuff I normally do and what my mind really wants to. You know dresses, skirts, corsets maybe, heels. I love my loungewear, I do, but I want to dress up more again. I am a fancy pants kind of lady!
So, I have been wearing the wigs more. Much to the spouses grumbling, he can get over it. I have a medical/mental condition and honestly it is my head! OK, I should not be typing when extremely tired because I will be bitchy. Really bitchy, and I can not help it because who doesn’t become a Grouch when this tired. Being up since 2AM will do that to a person. I went to bed at 12AM because the littlest wouldn’t go to bed until 10:30PM and then the husband and I wanted to watch some YouTube videos together before bed. We were watching this dude make a clear resin Elsa and a clear pencil. Neat stuff. Anyways, we fell asleep by midnight only to be woken back up (me) at 2AM.
So, here I am once again. Tired. Grumpy. Drowning myself in coffee. And my kid is bouncing around as if he got a full night of sleep. I do not know how he does it. I am sure he will sleep some day. And I have learned when things get a little too hairy between us. I remove myself take a breather and then go from there. As a mom or parent in general raising kids is hard. Raising kids who have medical needs or are neuro-diverse is really hard and requires a lot of the parents. Which is fine, we love our kids. But it is also OK to admit, this shit is hard! It is, and for many of us we do not have that freaking village you hear so much about. People either can not be bothered to be a part of it. Do not want to be relied on for even the smallest things. And they bolt. You learn, as a parent of kids who are special needs or medical needs who really has your back and who doesn’t. We will get into that on another post. Anyways. I hope you get some sleep moms and dads. I hope your coffee is as strong as your kids. Remember you are loved!
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