Trichotillomania and trying to manage it.

I hate this condition. Hate it, and just when I feel I have it under control , I don’t actually. I pull and pull. I break my hair and pick at the split ends. I do this when anxious, stressed, depressed, bored….It really sucks. SUCKS. And so I wear a wig to help me, and I take Magnesium. And I try to do better by it and try not to beat myself up.

The wigs, help me not pull. While my spouse doesn’t really like the wigs, I wear them for me and no one else. I wear them to help with this condition. And also It gives me the hair that I always have wanted. Unfrizzy, pretty colors, long, and just pretty.

I view having these as a tool a way to keep me from destroying and pulling out all of my hair.And some may think it is weird but it is necessary for me. Honestly, I wish I didn’t wait so long to muster up the courage to buy and wear wigs. Especially, since they help me so much with my condition.

I was scared of what others would think. Scared of how my spouses would react, considering when I put on my first pair of extensions I got “who are you dressing up for?” In the most aggressive and insulting way ever. I took them out and felt miserable and stupid and fake the rest of the day. I was scared, even though the extensions were starting to help me.

It wasn’t until I started to get therapy that I realized I need to do this for me. For my recovery with Trichotillomania, although my recovery is horrendous due to me attacking my hair whenever the wig came off. And the fear of what others think is fading away. It is for my own well-being, and if people even if they are family, friends, whatever need to be accepting and encouraging.

After all encouraging is what I would be for them!

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